New Year-Same Old, Same Old

I hate New Year's Eve and New Year's Day. New Year's Day, in my opinion, barely qualifies as a holiday and I detest it. Kind of random for an opening line, huh? Especially considering its actually January 26, well past that particular "holiday". You know I said that for a reason, right? Other than to state my opinion about New Year's as a preposterous non-holiday holiday. I said it to let you know what this blog post is about. Just wanted to make that clear. You've known me long enough to know that subtlety is not my strong-suit. Sarcasm and stating the obvious are my strong-suits. Thus this paragraph. It's rife with my strong-suits.

Anyway, allow me to enlighten you as to why I hate New Year's Day. In our house, currently Horseford Road and previously Poplar Street before that, the inevitability of 12/31 and 01/01 makes family members quake with fear. Not because we're afraid of noise makers and stupid looking hats and confetti. No, if only that was our only concern. No, that time period evokes fear in the hearts of myself, the hubs and, to a lesser degree, the punks, because we never know what kind of medical tragedy is going to befall us or our other family members.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm crazy. And of course, you're right. I am but that's got nothing to do with this and is a completely separate blog. I talk alot about studies and empirical evidence, even though I've never actually done any studies or provided any empirical evidence to back any of my non-existent studies. I actually have proof of this though. I can provide irrefutable proof that somewhere, someone or something, is determined to make us so afraid of 12/31 and 01/01 that we'll lock ourselves in our home on Christmas Day and not resurface again until Martin Luther King Jr's birthday.

Example #1: (This evidence will be presented in descending order, with the most recent examples provided first, because it's easier for me to remember that way. And it's my blog and I can do whatever I want.)

Anyway, Example #1(2011/2012) : Toothache, pulled muscle, "broken" foot.
As seen previously on Facebook, because pretty much everything on this blog has been seen previously on Facebook, 01/02/2012 found me lying on the couch after having a tooth yanked unceremoniously from my jaw. The toothache developed on 12/30/2011 but really kicked in on 01/01/2012. I seriously thought I was going to die. Well, not really. I didn't think I was going to die but man alive it reallllllllly hurt.

On 12/31, I was baking cupcakes or something, moved funny, and pulled a muscle in my back. It hurt then, especially when I had to sit through our New Year's service at church and found it difficult to get comfortable. On 01/01 it hurt worse but I was so consumed by other pain, from my tooth, and hopped up on Motrin, that I didn't notice it too much.

Prior to this, on 12/29, I think, I stood up from my couch. My foot was asleep and I came down funny on it and seriously thought I'd broken it. It hurt like CRAZY!! I had this awesome big knot or something pop up on it, it swelled, and turned some lovely shades of blue and yellow. It actually still hurts.

That was the most recent incident. Now, let's skip back to 01/04/2011. I know that this is not actually New Year's Eve or New Year's day but close enough.

Example #2 (2010/2011): As previously reported on Facebook and in this blog, I fell down the basement stairs and thought I was going to die. Well, not really. But it hurt alot. And it was embarrassing. I'll spare you the repetition of the details here and refer you to the post titled, "The Day I Ripped My New Tights", or something like that.

Now, let's skip back a little farther, before this blog was conceived. I know it's hard to think of a time that I wasn't spewing out the Gospel According to BKCMom, but trust me, there was a time. A time before it was put into writing anyway. This incident does not involve me, but should serve as a warning to family members that being related to me is not necessarily in your best interest, if there was previously a question regarding that.

I don't know the exact date of this of the next example. I know I was just returning to work at my oldest old job from the holiday break, which would have happened on 01/04/2010 or thereabouts. And it was before I started my new old job, which was 01/10/2010. So, again, not necessarily specific to the holiday but close enough to be jumbled in with the others. Someone else in the family can clarify the dates.

Example #3 (2009/2010): A weekend evening. Cleaning up after Christmas decorations were taken down. Hubs gets a call stating that his father has had some sort of cardiac episode and is being taken to the hospital. Episode results in father-in-law having major cardiac by-pass surgery. Again, not really about me but illustrates the point that most of the time, we're spending some time during the first week of January at the hospital.

The worst of the worst. We seemed to have a couple of relatively quiet ones, as far as I can remember but the two previous ones more than made up for it.

Example #4 (2006/2007): On 12/29/2006 we were told that our baby's cancer had returned and there was nothing left to be done for him. On 12/31 he spiked a fever and had to go to the emergency room. While there he started having a seizure and had to be flown via helicopter to Columbus. We followed behind. Somewhere near Ironton, OH, I was pulled over by an Ohio Highway Patrolman. Hubs was asleep beside me. I woke him up. I had to open my door because, at the time, the driver's window of my car wouldn't roll down. I couldn't find some of the documentation that he'd asked for. I was wearing a big sloppy t-shirt because my angel had puked on my sweater in the emergency room. I told the Patrolman that he'd been flown out and we were heading for the hospital. He let me go and told me to slow down. I didn't.

Example #5 (2005/2006) As previously described in another post on this blog, 12/31/2005 was the day our baby was diagnosed with cancer. New Year's Eve and Day were spent in the hospital. He was sick, I was experiencing morning sickness, and everyone was worried, grieving, and stressed.

This one again doesn't involve me but should also serve as a warning to family members, especially the in-laws, that the last week of December and first week of January would be a good time to stay away from me. I think this is the right year. I'm not sure on the the dates but I know it was New Years because we'd just ordered furniture and I was excited about that. Angel BK was a baby at the time but I wasn't working so he was less than 2 years old. He was walking already when this occurred because I can remember him walking around in our empty living room when we awaited the delivery of our furniture. He started walking about about 14 months. So that narrows the timeline down pretty good.

Example #6 (2004/2005) At this time the father-in-law drove a truck on the road. By that I mean he drove a semi and delivered stuff. He was in Tennessee at the time and got incredibly sick when he made his delivery. He actually had to be hospitalized. His wife went to be with him. She got sick as well. So, the hubs, the baby, me and the brother-in-law loaded up and drove several hours to retrieve both people and both of their vehicles. Of course this is nowhere near as traumatic as the other examples but it was the first. We spent the entire, I mean entire, day on the road. It was awful. A baby buckled in a car seat for an entire day. If that happened now, I'd probably tell everyone involved they were on their own. I was much nicer then.

Now, as far as I can remember, those are the only examples I have. I need to remind you though that out of the 11 new years my husband and I have welcomed together, 6 of them have been spent thus. So, the moral of this story? New Year's=Bad.

Wow.....

Okay, so it's been a really long time since I did a blog post. I have no excuse other than to say I've been busy...............Okay, okay, okay. I didn't believe I was going to leave it at that either. If you know anything about me there's no making a long story short where I'm concerned. There's certainly the exact opposite of that, making a short story long, but NEVER making a long story short. So, of course I have an excuse. I've been busy. To make a short story long, I've been a single parent for most of this time. I haven't left my baby daddy or anything, he's just been working away from home for the majority of the time since I last wrote a blog post. And of course, I've been diligent in my housewifery. Somewhere in this house, my hubs just laughed out loud and he has no idea why. I've been watching a lot of Spongebob and Phineas and Ferb. I prefer P & F but I have little say in the matter. And, naturally, I've been baking cupcakes, sometimes a couple hundred sometimes just a few. But I've definitely been baking them.

See.....

Hey, wait a minute. That's not me. That's my cutie-patootie, freckled-face niece Banana and her baby sister, Ta. And that's not cupcakes, that's sugar cookies. That's when they stayed all night at our house. It was like one of those food vacations you can take, where you check out all the local restaurants and stuff. These awesome chicks came to my house, ate pizza for dinner, made sugar cookies, had chips and cheese and popcorn while we watched a movie, had waffles for breakfast the next morning, and then made, you know, cupcakes. I promised Banana I'd feature her in my blog. I'd forgotten to do it when she helped me put the chocolate fountain together for her brother's graduation party, so I definitely owed her. So, Banana, here you go!!

In other news, this is my kid....

If you're on my Facebook, you've already seen this. I don't mean this is my kid in disguise, I mean this is my kid. He just took this costume out the other day and wore it around for the entire day. If he's not wearing this, he's definitely wearing his cape. He wears it all the time. And if he's not wearing this costume, he's definitely wearing his pajamas, if he's home. Because, if he's home, he's always wearing his pajamas. He doesn't want to wear anything but his pajamas. Sometimes, he takes his pajamas off, takes a bath, then puts his pajamas back on. His Spongebob pajamas are his favs. But, in the event that he's worn them for a few days straight and Mommy or Daddy makes him take them off so they can be laundered, he'll wear something else. So long as it's pajamas. And he will take his pajamas off to put other pajamas on, if he stumbles across a pair that he likes better. Here, he's mixing it up a bit, Spongebob and Iron Man (they're really Superman but he things every thing is Iron Man). Pay no attention to the glasses, they're prescription. :)

This is my other turkey. He really was Iron Man. This of course was from Halloween. We went Trick-or-Treating. I think we went to 8 houses. We still haven't eaten all of the candy.

This is also my boy, the day after Thanksgiving, putting wreaths onto the windows upstairs. Now, this picture is old, and most everyone has seen it already. So, we've been lectured and told not to let our 5 year old on the roof. And we've replied, "Sheesh, it was just the porch roof. He was only one story up. And he's been wanting to do it for years now. Lighten up." Let me tell you, that is not a response people appreciate. They don't appreciate it all. It makes me laugh though and really, isn't that all that matters. (My child was never in any danger during the taking of this picture or the hanging of the wreaths. Come on people, give us some credit.)

In other news, we are now the proud owners of a new vehicle. Yeah, this is my new ride.

I'm kidding of course. This is not my new ride. This is in fact a concrete truck. How many of you were thinking that this is exactly the kind of truck I need to drive? You can admit it. I expect most of you, especially the ones related to me by blood, to think that. I'm horribly offended but, what can you do? This is when we poured concrete for a patio at the rear of our house. My big boy was at school so I had to document the entire thing. Yeah, it was somewhat uncomfortable. I was running around in our yard with a camera and a camcorder while 4 men were doing all the things that concrete requires. I'm fairly certain they either thought I was a lunatic or interested in taking one or more of them out to dinner.

So, now it's Christmas time. I'm still baking cupcakes. Now I'm making fudge, cookies, and truffles as well. And I've discovered that I despise making truffles. So, don't expect any from me. Ever. Seriously, I hate them. With every fiber of my being. What I don't hate......

Look!!! It's my favorite things!!! Gorgeous shoes and sugary sweet goodness!!! Ah.....

More sugary sweet goodness. I watched this movie. My reaction at the time was, "Oh, Thor, where have you been all my life?" My reaction remains the same.

And, of course I still love purses. So, Santa, if you're listening, I would really like a new purse. I've behaved no more inappropriately than I have any other year, so......It's true, I haven't purchased any of the above pictures in a very long time. Wait! No. I mean, I haven't purchases shoes or purses in a very long time. I've NEVER purchased a human being. Ever.

That's not to say, of course, that, were the occassion to present itself, I would not purchase Thor. Because, I can't promise that. But, that's another post for another day. And a long discussion between the hubs and myself to determine if we have the money, if it would require an addition to the house, you know, things like that.

I'm kidding of course. Right now, the only men I wish to have in my life are these dudes and the one taking the picture....

I know I look like a deranged axe murderer in this picture but like I said before, what can you do?

Oh my goodness!! It's been almost 2 months since I wrote on this blog. You, my beautiful viewing public have gone almost 2 months since you've been subjected to, tortured by, gifted with a blog post. I'm sure you've been terribly disappointed. So, it is my compulsion, obsession, pleasure to provide you with one.

So, you're asking yourself, what has BKCMom been so busy doing that she has forsaken her audience? In a word, a word that you're no doubt TIRED of hearing, cupcakes. Yes, I said it even though I think I promised in another post that I wouldn't. I've been busy making cupcakes, hundreds of dozens of cupcakes. And for a change of pace, that isn't an exaggeration. I've literally made hundreds of dozens of cupcakes. And sold them. For money. But don't tell the health department that I've been doing that, because they really don't like it when people make food in their homes and sell it. I was informed of that recently via certified letter. I'm pretty sure no good news comes via certified mail.

In other news, my Big BK has started school, kindergarten to be exact. He was so excited the first morning that he wanted to go early. He was wearing one of his 11 new outfits. He looked like this....

 Because this picture is the first day of school.

I was so proud of him. He didn't cry when I left, which was about 10 minutes after we got there. He just hugged me and told me he loved me. I've raised such an independent, brave little boy. Well, I guess his daddy, mommaw and poppaw had something to do with it too. But I don't mind taking credit.

When I picked him up at the end of the day he asked me if he had to go back the next day. I told him yes. I'm not sure how happy he was about it.

Day number 2 he had homework to do. By the time we finished with his homework, he was exhausted, I was exhausted, we'd both shed alot of tears and done a lot of yelling. This is what his homework looked like.

Yes, your eyes are not deceiving you. He had to write his name, 3 letters, followed by an uppercase L, a zero, a lowercase L and a circle. He had to do these things 3 time. And it took.....two......hours. I'm tired just thinking about it now. Things have gotten better since then. Now it takes nowhere near that long. And let me tell you, I'm happy about that.

I can't go into what the baby has been doing for the past few weeks. It's completely inappropriate for this blog, as it's completely family-friendly. Suffice it to say, he's entered a phase in his toddlerdom that I really wish he wasn't in. I REALLLLLY wish he wasn't in this phase.

In case you were curious about what I've been doing, what I mentioned earlier, here is some photographic evidence of my endeavours...

The cupcakes pictured here are: Red Velvet, Coconut, and Banana Pudding. If you ever have the opportunity to try the Banana Pudding, I strongly recommend that you try it. It will change your life. It is that good. The others aren't bad either, if I do say so, and you know I do.....:)

My Dog Ate My Blog Post

Though I wouldn't put it past one of the despicable animals, I mean, they have eaten shoes, toys, and kittens, the dog did not in fact eat my blog post. At least as far as I know. If I was shooting for a realistic excuse I would've said my baby ate my blog post, I mean, he has eaten shoes, toys, and kittens. Well, he nibbled on them. Shoes, toys, and kittens. He never actually swallowed one or anything. As far as I know.

I was writing another post very soon after the last one I posted. By very soon I mean a day or two. I was considerably into it when something happened. I pushed the wrong button or something. I'm going to blame it on the baby. He's always a good fall guy. He's too cute to get into any trouble. And he always blames everything on his older brother. When this something happened, I assumed my draft to that point had been saved because it usually works that way. When I went back a couple of days ago to work on it some more, I couldn't fnd it. I'd added pictures and everything. And now I can't remember what I was writing about. The pitfalls of old age I guess. No, wait, I'm not old. I'm 29. Yeah. I'm 29. I keep forgetting. Part of getting old I suppose. No! I'm not getting old. Sheesh!

So, I guess I'll just start all over. I posed the question a few weeks ago on facebook..."Do you know what happens when you give a 2 year old a snack sized Oreo McFlurry in the car and tell him to be careful and not spill it?" Assuming this question was rhetorical, no one answered. I had posted a picture along with it though so there waw really no need for a response. You know what they say, a picture is worth a thousand words. That may well be true, but I don't make a living with pictures. Words are my bread and butter. Well, they're not really my bread and butter. Trains are my bread and butter. Words are my obsession, I guess you could say. In light of that, here is an illustrated list of what happens when you give a 2 year old an Oreo McFlurry and tell him to be careful and not spill it.

First of all, he laughs maniacally because he now has physical proof that his mother is a SUCKER.



Second, if the pictures are any indication, he takes 2 drinks then rubs the cookie-laced ice cream concoction all over his hands, face, and knees.

Third, he sticks his tongue out at his poor beleagured mother because he knows she's in for it when Daddy finds out. After all, Daddy had just spent the afternoon cleaning out her car. And when Mommy rats him out, which she most definitely will do, as she's know for her tendancy to throw absolutely anyone under the bus to save her own hide with very little incentive, he knew all he would have to do is tell Daddy, while looking at him with that now perfect smile, "I wuv ewe." He'd never see the first second in time out and we both knew it.

Fourth, he hangs his head in shame because Mommy has just lectured him about ruining a white shirt and shorts that both of his brothers had worn without destroying. He appears contrite but secretly he is proud that he did something neither of the older BKs was able to do. Even if it did make him Mommy scream like a banshee most of the 25 minute drive home.



Finally, he has the nerve, the unmitigated audacity, to tell his mommy that his hands are "icky". Since my son is working very hard to create his own, much more simplified language where "shosher" means shower, flip flop, and trailer, I understood that this meant his hands were sticky and he wanted to wash them. I suppose he was unconcerned with that his legs were sticky, his feet were sticky, his knees were sticky, and his face was sticky, not to mention the fact that the ice cream was in the buckle of his car seat and there was a good possibility that he would be stuck there. Of course, this really sent his mother over the edge.

One of these days there's going to be something really wrong at my house but no one is going to pay any attention because they're going to think I'm screaming at one of the kids again. Big BK now says I'm a yeller. I'm okay with that. I told him to keep it up and I'd be a yeller and a spanker. He wasn't scared. I'm not sure why.

The next morning, after I wrote this, I'm posting it. I went to my blog and couldn't find it. I clicked on drafts and there it was. Along with the last one I wrote and lost as well as like 6 others that I've started and haven't finished. So, here you go!

Outside Stuff

Please view the following series of photos taken by the author on Friday, July 01, 2011.

Now, please allow me to narrate what you've seen. That is my husband's Craftsman lawn tractor. He purchased that tractor long ago, when we still lived in a mobile home on something like 1/8 of an acre. His rationale was that he needed to mow the lot that we currently live on, years before we started building our house. That Craftsman tractor has been accessorized with completely necessary items such as a brush guard, wheel weights, and some kind of thing-a-ma-jig (that is of course the technical term for it) that allows him to hook up a trailer, it moves up and down, has a handle-I don't really know what it is though I want to say a hitch. Hubs loves that tractor. It's like a brand new one. In fact, the brother-in-law thought it was new, not something like 8 years old.

Now, sitting on top of that tractor are my 2 year old and 4 year old. They have not been accessorized with anything other than some dental work-in fact, the baby had just had some done on this day. If you were able to flip through these photos quickly, you would see that the tractor is moving across my lawn. Since you can't move them quickly, I tried to get the tree in my front yard in the pictures as a point of reference.

Also in this picture you see the hubs. Please notice that he is nowhere near the tractor as it is moving across the lawn. And please ignore the muscle shirt that he is wearing, the one that you could read the newspaper through if you had to. In a couple of the pictures, you will also find our dog Peanut. She seems to always be where there are people, especially little people. And she likes to lick and jump. I hate that in a dog.

Now, if you're asking yourself if the boys are literally driving the tractor or is this a very intricate and time-consuming gag, the answers are yes and no. Well, more like kind of yes and no. The boys are driving the tractor. Well, the 2 year old isn't. We would never be so negligent as to allow a 2 year old to drive a tractor. Shoot, when his daddy lets him drive the car he just barely keeps it on the road. (I'm laughing at this joke but it is completely true.) When I say "We" of course I mean him, the hubs, my baby daddy. I would choose not to allow my children to drive anything that is operated my anything more powerful than a Power Wheels battery.

Back to the question. We would never allow Baby BK to drive a tractor. That would be ridiculous. He is there to hold the seat down because his brother's little scrawny carcass isn't heavy enough. That is why the answer was kind of yes. He is not driving but his brother very much is. And no, this is not some kind of intricate and time-consuming gag. I would never put that much effort into anything that doesn't result in at least a dozen cupcakes. You see, Daddy thinks it's a good idea to turn the tractor on, put it in the lowest gear possible, engage the blades, and set the twerps to mowing a swath through the vacant lot next to ours. Apparently they tromp through there pretty regularly and like to keep a path mowed. Big BK crosses our yard, mows his path, drives the tractor back through the yard and into the garage. All. By. Himself. And Baby BK is just along for the ride. And to hold the seat down.

I am going to add that while this is going on, I'm inside, pretending I don't know anything about it. Occasionally though, like on this day, the hubs comes and gets me because the two punks are just too cute not to watch. And he's taped it, so he can show it to everyone. And so that there will be physical evidence for the prosecution to use against us when the time comes. I mean, of course, IF the time should come. It's not like this is a bad idea or anything, right. Nothing bad could happen. I mean, he is almost 5 years old now. It's about time he starts pulling his weight around here, all 36 pounds, and I'm having no luck getting him to pick up his dirty underpants or throw his empties in the trash. (Juice boxes, of course.)

And this is precisely the reason that my baby is obsessed with mowing grass. Engage him in conversation. He will tell you that "Daddy mow grass."; "Mommaw mow grass."; "Poppaw ride four wheeler." (just to mix it up a little and keep you on you toes); "Ben mow grass."; "Me mow grass." You may or may not be able to understand him but he will talk a lot about mowing grass. Go ahead, ask him who cuts grass. I dare you. 

While I was outside taking pictures of this atrocious act of gross parental negligence, I also took pictures of my side of the porch. Yeah, I said my side of the porch. It is in fact a side of the porch dedicated solely to me. I made a rule a long time ago that no one that was driven by testosterone would be allowed past the chimney, which divides my part of the porch from the rest. I made the rule and his has been ignored approximately 3876 times. Of course that is an estimation on my part as I have no intention of counting the number of times rules are broken at our house. Counting the times I alone break the rules would consume all of my time and I'd never get any laundry done.

I would really love, beyond anything else, to get one of those awesome outdoor sectionals for this little corner. That however is not going to happen anytime in the near future unless I can find an outstanding deal on one. I just happened to have an outdoor dining set in the basement, being ignored and gathering dust because our deck is in shambles and we have no patio. So, I thought, why not use those chairs until I can get what I want. I had everything already in my possession for this except for the outdoor area rug, which I purchased at Walmart.

This is the view from the yard.

And this is what Peanut the dog did to my rug. I guess I was kind of asking for it. I mean, I did put an outdoor rug outdoors on my porch, in an area that the animals rarely populate. And it laid there unobtrusively for a couple of weeks. I'm sure Peanut held out as long as she could. She's a good dog. She would never steal flip flops out the garage and destroy them like her BFF Haley the dog. No, she's a goo dog who just gets a little excited when she sees something new, like a toy that belongs to the neighbor dog or one of the children in the house. Not like that dumb dog Bailey who lays under the porch most of the time and minds his own business. Yep, clearly this was all my fault. When will I learn?

Yeah, I'm Going to Say It......Cupcakes

Well, I'm clearly slacking on this whole blogging thing seeing as how I haven't put a post up here in 3 weeks or better. I apologize for that. I certainly don't wish to disappoint you, my viewing and reading public. So, here goes.....

For those of you who don't know, I am currently a stay-at-home mom. I might have mentioned that in the last blog but I'm too lazy to go back and look. Anyway, I've been a stay-at-home mommy since the end of April. It's been great. And it's been the most horrible torture ever inflicted on a member of the human race. It just depends on which day of the week you're asking. With the hubs working the way he currently is and my father's health problems, and my desire to not have my mother be driven completely insane by the psychological terrorists that are her grandchildren, it was determined that I could now, for the first time since my Angel BK was 2 years old, stay home and take care of my children. Yeah, I know what you're thinking...SUCKER! And right now, I'd agree with you.

Apparently my Big BK, you know, that dude, the one in the cape eating cheesecake with what looks to be a shovel, is going through an emotional blackmail phase. He has told me twice today that he hates me. Occasionally he tells me that he hates his brother or the situation he's in, that he's never going to like whatever it is I'm making him do, like apologize. By occasionally I mean 261 times per day. Then he looks at me sometimes, once every 3 weeks or something like that, and says he's going to start being nice to his brother and he's not going to be mean anymore. And like a schmuck I believe him....well, kind of. There's always a part of me that thinks and says out loud, "Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it." He does it just enough though to keep a tiny little kernel of hope alive inside of me. Stupid hope.

He told me one day that he was going to be mean from now on. He was never going to be nice again. My response? I said, "God have mercy on all of us if this was you being good."

In other news, I'm on a cupcake kick, in case you haven't been made aware. If you're on my facebook, in my Sunday School class or a member of my immediate family, you've been made aware of this and been forced to consume all of the cupcakes I've made.

 

These are my made from scratch chocolate cupcakes with cream cheese frosting. I was trying different toppings and different icing tips here. Walnuts are a great garnish on these.

These are Cookies-n-Cream cupcakes, a favorite with the kiddies. These are dark chocolate cupcakes baked with an Oreo in the bottom then filled with a marshmallow cream and topped with buttercream or cream cheese frosting, depending on my mood. Obviously, they're garnished with Oreos. These particular pink ones were for my beautiful niece's birthday. She specially requested them after sampling some at Easter.

These are Strawberries-N-Cream cupcakes. These are white cupcakes filled with cream cheese and strawberry filling, topped with cream cheese frosting then garnished with a ripe strawberry. These were made for the Mother-Daughter Banquet at church. A banquet I did not attend. I did have my picture taken when I dropped off the cupcakes and a Tropical Trifle though.....

The other baby was asleep in the car and when that one is taking a nap nobody in their right mind wakes him up.

I like this one because of the hat. I think I'm going to borrow that hat and start wearing it everyday. Does it look like my boy is only humoring me and the photog, Paula. Nothing new under the sun there...he's always just humoring me, i.e., see above about the promise to not be mean.

These were from scratch dark chocolate cupcakes filled with white chocolate meringue buttercream and topped with green buttercream frosting. Because, you know, why not green? These were for Mommaw's birthday. The filling was actually supposed to be icing but it deflated on me and wasn't pipeable. They were supppppper rich. I used extra p's because they were that rich. Baby BK helped make this. Mommaw doesn't know it because I forgot to tell her, but the mixer was not turned on that Baby BK wasn't using it. He was there throughout the entire process, on his step-stool, getting in my way, demanding that his apron be put on then taken off then put back on. This was the turning point in my cupcake expedition. This was when the family in MC demanded that I stop bringing cupcakes up. I think there's an issue about fitting into clothes and teeth rotting out and hyperactive children, I don't know.

These are white cupcakes with chocolate cream cheese frosting. This is my 2nd attempt to find a good recipe for white scratch cupcakes. This one works out well. It was a moist cupcake but it was overwhelmed by the frosting so I think in the future it will get a plain buttercream or a seven minute frosting. When I learn to make a seven minute frosting, of course. I might turn this into a cookies-n-cream cupcake as well to cut down on the richness of that cake.

This is the white cupcake above with the absolute best buttercream frosting I've ever made or taken part in. They were fantastic. The icing was fantastic. When I topped them with chocolate-covered strawberries they were even more fantastic. Because there is never anything wrong with adding a chocolate-covered strawberry, am I right? Of course I am.  

And here, my dear readers, is what started it all. These are cupcakes from Baby BK's birthday, way back in October of 2010. On the left you see strawberry cupcakes filled with marshmallow cream and topped with buttercream frosting. In the right you see chocolate cupcakes filled with chocolate fudge ganache and topped with buttercream frosting. The buttercream on these was exceptionally delicious as well but it was a total fluke and I couldn't recreate it if I tried although I do believe it involved the addition of a stick of butter.

So, that is the end of my cupcake tour. Should you be interested in trying some of my cupcakes, let me know. I'll put you on my guinea pig list so long as you promise to be honest about taste, texture, overall flavor and quality. Just not too honest. I can take constructive criticism.....to a point, then I just start to get mad.

If you would be interested in purchasing cupcakes for a special occassion, let me know. Plain, delicious cupcakes in your choice of flavor with your choice of frosting, topped with sprinkles or sugars if you so desire, are $12.00 per dozen. Filled cupcakes will cost anywhere from $15 to $18 dollars per dozen depending on type of filling and type of garnish, i.e., chocolate filled with fudge and topped with buttercream or cream cheese frosting will cost $15 per dozen; Cookies-N-Cream or Strawberries-n-Cream, as described above, or chocolate cupcakes filled with peanut butter cream and topped with peanut butter frosting and garnished with mini peanut butter cups will be priced higher. All cupcakes are made from scratch and baked fresh, never frozen, and delivered. 

How'd you like that little sales pitch? Pretty awesome, huh? I thought so too. And just to bring a smile to your face......... 

Because you can't look at this three-quarters naked boy fake smiling as he drips chocolate from a strawberry all over my counter and not smile.

I'm Back

I know it's been a while. I had no idea until I just looked how long it actually had been. What on Earth have you all done without your periodic dose of mildly humorous satire? Probably caught up on some important reading, planted some flowers, cleaned your shower...substitute whatever task you've been using this blog as an excuse to miss. I, for one, have been doing laundry and cooking in addition to working regularly. I only really enjoy doing one of those things. I'll leave it to you to test your memory and decide which one.

To refresh your memory.........

This is me. Since I last posted, I have been to the eye doctor and now wear contacts again. I also have been to the salon and am no longer sporting all the gray hair. It's now orange and yellow...I mean red and blonde. I'm also a year older. I've had a birthday. In fact, my birthday is today. Can't divulge anymore info than that though. It's top secret, highly classified. I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you. Seriously.

These are the two punks, Big BK and Baby BK. We were cooking in this picture..obviously. I'm really good at stating the obvious. It's what I do. ;)

This is Big BK at Easter. We've celebrated that since last we spoke, as well. How cute was he? I know, abolutely irresistably adorable. Takes that after his mommy, hehe.

And this is my Baby BK. I have nothing to add to this picture, it requires nothing.Not with a face like that.

This is our family at Easter. We match, of course. It's our thing. That dude beside of me is the hubs. See what I mean about the hair...the color I mean.

This is what we've been doing with our time since last I spoke to you.

Yes, we made our son redo our kitchen floor. Now, first of all, these pictures are not in chronological order. Again, stating the obvious. Second, we do not endorse slave labor in any fashion unless the slave happens to be your own child. Then, I say, you've created them with God's blessing and can utilize their physical capabilities in the way that best benefits the family. Third, this was like Christmas for my son. He was given a hammer and told to tear up the floor. It was like this dream come true, his wish upon a star, etc. etc. He took up all four of these tiles by himself as well as several others and the concrete board beneath. He was a great helper that day. Especially since he'd gotten over a stomach virus only the day before.

This is what my better half has been up to.

The hubs has been at work officially since March. This means that he has been out of town regularly, for large snatches of time, leaving me home with the boys to go to work, clean house, do laundry and dishes, run to the doctor and pharmacy, pay the bills, get the boys and myself to Sunday school, church, and bible study  and tuck the boys in at night by myself. That, my dears, is precisely the reason that I haven't created a blog post in a while. Being a single parent is hard.  

And this is what I've been doing....in additon to the things listed above....well since April 29, my job has been, my official, paid position is.................

That's not an error. I meant to leave that area blank. Since 04-29 I have been unemployed, by choice. I am now a stay at home mommy. That is not to say that, as a stay at home mommy I have nothing to do. I've actually been busier since I quit my day job than I was before because I can no longer in good conscience ignore the things that need to be done around the house.

So, that's what's been going on with the folks at 815 Old Horseford Road. Well, what's been going on with the 4 of us anyway. I can't speak as to what the mouse that I'm now subletting to has been doing with his time, other than crawling all over my cabinets, appliances, and coffee table leaving evidence of his presence. I don't actually have a contractual agreement with this rodent that requires me to provide his housing but I've been unable to remove him from my house so I might as well. And you all know how I feel about mice, right?

And now I'm including these pictures just becaue I like them. 

And this one...

My punks are eating the white chocolate raspberry cheesecake I made myself for my birthday. I laid my fork down to take this picture. My Big BK is dressed like a knight. He asked me why he couldn't fly when he wore his cape. I told him it was because he didn't know how. I'm not sure how that answer measures up. It might not ahve been right. My Baby didn't actually eat any of the cheesecake. He just poked holes in it with his fork and his fingers. I wasn't surprised to have to say, "Get your hands out of my cheesecake or I will get my wooden spoon." It's something that I knew I would eventually have to say but that is another story for another day.